Bullying
What do we mean by Bullying?
Bullying is the intentional, repetitive or persistent hurting of one person by another, where the relationship involves an imbalance of power. It can take many forms:
- verbal – name-calling, offensive remarks
- physical – hitting, kicking
- indirect - excluding someone from a social group, or sending malicious text messages.
Anyone can be bullied, and children can both bully and be bullied. It can happen in or out of school.
What are the signs to look out for?
Some children find it hard to talk about bullying. You might suspect bullying if your child:
- is anxious or frightened about going to school
- begins to produce poor work
- comes home with missing or damaged belongings
- sleeps badly or becomes upset at bedtimes
- has unexpected bruises or scratches
- becomes withdrawn or shows other significant changes in behaviour
What if I think my child is being bullied?
Speak to your child and take them seriously. Don't ignore bullying or agree to keep it a secret. Speak calmly with your child and offer reassurance. Encourage them to report future incidents to their teacher. Speak to school staff about this. There are things that they can do to help. Ask the school what they are going to do and keep in touch. Ask to see the school's anti-bullying policy. All schools must have an anti-bullying policy that sets out how it deals with incidents of bullying.
If things don't improve, ask to see the head teacher. If you still need help, then contact the Chair of Governors. You can then also contact the Principal Educational Psychologist in Cumbria's Children’s Service.
What if I think my child is bullying others?
There are many reasons why a child might bully others. For example, they might not know it is wrong, they might be copying others, or they might be encouraged by their friends. They might not have learned better ways of mixing with other children, or they could be having a difficult time and acting out aggressive feelings. To stop the bullying talk to your child and explain that bullying is unacceptable. Discourage other family members from using aggression to get what they want. Speak with a teacher and regularly check how things are going in school. Praise your child when they are kind and cooperative.
Who can help with Anti-Bullying work?
Several local services offer support in cases of bullying. Some offer training to schools on approaches that have been shown to be helpful in reducing bullying. Some will offer advice when particular cases of bullying occur. Others will also work with you to support children who have been bullied or who themselves bully other children. Some of these services can be approached directly by parents, whilst others normally work through schools.
Where else can I find information?
"Safe to Learn" gives guidance from the Department for Children, Schools and Families (DCSF) that has information on anti-bullying. You can reach the site and find documents to download by following this this link:
http://www.teachernet.gov.uk/publications (external link)
Additional guidance on anti-bullying called "Don't Suffer in Silence" is accessible online and contains helpful information and links for professionals, children, parents and carers:
Finally, if you are a child, a parent or carer, or a teacher, help and advice on taking action to reduce bullying can be found at:
Here you can find information, resources and useful links to other sites. There is information on how to deal with text and e-mail bullying, too.
Children can also ring Childline on 0800 1111